Weight Loss For Small Animal Veterinarians

Helping small animal veterinarians stop emotional or stress eating and change the focus in their lives from what to eat next to an amazingly fulfilling personal life and professional career.

Episode 45 - The First Domino Piece ✨

In this episode, you'll learn how I changed 30 years of bad sleep habits in just 2 months!

WHAT YOU WILL DISCOVER 
- The first domino piece - sunlight ☀
- The second domino piece - stop using screens 2 hours before bed
- The third domino piece - Non-Sleep Deep Rest

LINKS SPECIFIC TO THIS EPISODE
👉 Book a free call with me here: ⁠⁠⁠https://calendly.com/vetcoachinternational/45min⁠⁠⁠
👉 Sign Up for my free resources: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.vetcoachinternational.com/signup-free-resources⁠

HOW TO FIND ME OUTSIDE THE PODCAST
Find all the ways that you can interact with me here: ⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/vetcoach⁠⁠⁠ (free resources can be found here)

Full Transcript

Nadina Cojocaru 00:02
Welcome to weight loss for small animal veterinarians podcast. I am Nadina Cojocaru, DVM, and certified life and weight coach. This is episode 45 of the podcast. And as you can notice, I don't have an intro or the classical type of intro that I used to have with the music and everything. And that is because I want to try it for a while to not have the fluff in the beginning of the podcast. If I would be really honest, I would just start by telling you, this is the episode x of the weight loss for small animal veterinarians podcast. But that apparently is not such a great idea from the marketing perspective. So apparently, I have to tell my name, or to say my name, or to say the name of the podcast. So it appears often in Google searches and stuff like that. On the other note, you can help me with that. So you can share this, this podcast with your friends, with your colleagues, with other veterinarians or veterinary professionals. So you can spread the word about my work as much as possible. And then maybe I won't need an intro or outro. altogether. And we'll just go deep into the matter that I want to share with you with that specific podcast episode. So how can you help me to promote my podcast, really simple. Save it, download it on your podcast provider of choice, like Apple podcasts, or Google podcasts, or whatever you use, or Spotify for that matter. rate and review the podcast, please give me some stars there. And then share it with your friends as I said, so what is this episode all about? And as I said, this is episode 45 of the podcast. And this is, for me a really important episode because I want to talk to you about the first domino piece. And the first domino piece for everything related with health or dealing with with our lives in general, is natural sunlight. I cannot tell you how much my life changed in the last two months. So I was on a journey for a long, long, long, long, long time. And I am dead serious about it. That journey started probably in my early teens, when I identified myself as a night owl. And from that moment on, I was constantly trying to regulate my sleep. And my sleep patterns. becoming a veterinarian and preferring or loving to work in the emergency room department for the vast majority of my career didn't make it easier to regulate my sleep at an optimal level. And especially that thought that belief that I had, that I am a night owl that prevented me for probably more than 30 years to actually have a comfortable sleep. So how can I change 30 years of bad sleep habits in just two months. And by the way, it didn't take two months. I was just trying it over and over again in the last two months to not you know, come here and tell you that oh I did that. And it worked. And it's it's just the fluke, you now know, the results that I started to see. And that improved my sleep tremendously. We're visible, noticeable after probably 10 days, I am not kidding you even. So I was able to change over 30 years. Yes, I am that old, over 30 years of bad sleep in probably seven days, seven to 10 days. But let's say two weeks, and okay, I am generous right now, let's say two freaking months. So, what did I do? I researched, I studied, I was tenacious, I wanted to fix that because especially in the last three months, or three years, sorry, not three months, three years. When I started to go through perimenopause changes in my body, my sleep became a mess, a total mess. And I started to research what is happening? How can we improve our sleep, and I will give you my exact formula. And you will be able to apply the same things for you, and for your life and for your health and for your weight loss and for your stress level. And that will cost you nothing. Zip nada. Oh, yeah, you will have to have an internet connection to be able to listen to this podcast. And you will have to have an email address again. And, again, internet connection, because I have created a product that leaves under my free resources on my web page, and you will get the link in the show notes. So you can use that resource, that free resource that you will download. And you will be able to use it immediately. And the other techniques are also free. Because you know that saying that all the best things in life are free. This one is one of those things. So let me tell you exactly what I did. And why is this working? Because everything that I will present you right now is backed up with freaking solid scientific studies done on humans. So let's dive in the first domino piece that improves everything everything is getting natural sunlight into our eyes as soon as possible after sunrise, and as soon as possible after waking up in the morning. So what what is that meaning is? What did I do? And as I said, this is backed up with so many studies. Remember that I live in Scandinavia. I live in Sweden. So I am not that high up north. But still, if you think that or if you're listening to this podcast when it will be released in May 2023. And if I'm telling you that I started that practice and really applying it for two months for two months in the latest in the last two months. That mean means that I stopped start. I started somewhere in March 2023 So

Nadina Cojocaru 10:01
It's it was before the spring equinox. So the days were equal with the nights here in Scandinavia. But right now the days are so light, I get so much light right now, the sunrise is somewhere around 3am The sunset is around. I don't even remember right now like 10pm currently. So the days are really long. And how did I do it? I started by waking up in the morning especially for my vet job days, when I start at 7:30am, my vet job days start at 7:30am. So I always had problems waking up because I was unable to sleep, you know, waking up in the morning is dependent on how good you sleep during the night. I was I was hitting the snooze button over and over again, I can show you right now, my alarms on my phone, were set and are set at 530 in the morning, six in the morning, 630 in the morning, and so on and so on. And I was waking up just before having to go to my vet job because I was so tired because my sleep was a mess. So I started by during the days when I was at home when I am the coach, not the vet. I started by waking up with the alarm and around six o'clock in the morning and go outside immediately and staring at the Sun immediately after sunrise. So for this technique to work, we have to get sun into our eyes, sunlight, sunlight into our eyes, natural sunlight into our eyes in the first 30 minutes after waking up in the morning, and Max three hours after waking up in the morning, and as close as possible with a sunrise. Now, if the sunrise here is at 3am I won't do that I won't wake up because it's like the night is too short to not talk about people who are living above the polar circle or the Arctic Circle where right now they have the extended the extended day. So the the sun will rise I think probably you know on the 15th of May. And then it it doesn't set until I think end of July. end of June or no no end of July. I'm correct. So the the long day, you know the Arctic day long day with no sunset won't make that possible, you know to go outside. But that's a different story. You can still do this technique. Your brain will know if you're connecting this with your sleep and waking up in the morning consistently at the same hour and getting those rays of sunlight in your eyes. So backing up, waking up at 6am going into my garden and again it's cold. It's like freezing still freezing. So I had my winter pants and my winter jacket just outside that just by by my door to the back door of my house and I was just putting them on on top of my pajamas and I had a hat on a really thick hat on and just went outside and staring at the sun or towards the sun. Really, really important. Don't hurt your eyes. If you are able to watch the sun. When is rising in you know when you can see the sun immediately with a sunrise If that light is not so hurtful for your eyes, but otherwise, don't stare at the sun directly, don't do anything with your eyes that that is painful for sure don't damage your eyes by staring directly into the sun, what I mean is to stare towards the sun, or to stare into, you know, the direction of the horizon, but not directly to your sun to the sun, if it's painful, don't do it. So if it's really light, you just need five to 10 minutes, don't don't stare at your phone, but staring the horizon either direction or towards the east, but not directly into the sun over and over again, I will repeat this no sunglasses for this technique and contact lenses or correction glasses are okay because they will focus correctly the rays of sunshine on your retina, where we have some special cells some modified neurons sensitive neurons that are specially equipped to detect a special kind of light waves that are coming from the sun. When is low above the horizon, and those cells are not, or that type of light is not perceived consciously. Even blind people who have who still have the eye bulb inside their their skulls and who have retinal cells inside their eyes are supposed to do this thing and are sensitive to this cascade or this domino of events of physiological events that are happening in our eyes in our brains in our bodies that are triggered by those specific ways. The waves of sunlight that are hitting the retina at the correct correct time. So correction glasses are okay. Contact lenses are okay. Not sunglasses, and not through the window. So get outside, if you can see the sun for five to 10 minutes, it's enough every single day. If it's cloudy, if it's an overcast, if it's really really really gray, you will need probably 20 to 30 minutes of of staring towards the sun, those light waves are going through the clouds they are somehow blocked. But if you know from your position where the sun is you can stare directly into that direction because now it's not hurtful Of course. And if the weather conditions are really really bad, then you can have idle to be inside of your house and to look into that direction with the with the window open so not blocked through the window. And if it's really bad, really cloudy or you cannot see the light at all. If the sun is not risen yet then it's okay to use some kind of source of artificial light and for that

Nadina Cojocaru 19:42
it's okay to use any kind of ring light that you can find on Amazon or if you're Googling it. Any kind of ring light that is sold that is not expensive. That are that is sold for taking selfies or stuff like that. So those are probably like $20 or $30, it doesn't have to be expensive. The only thing is that you are supposed to stare at that light. Again, pretty close, but don't hurt your eyes. If it's painful, you are not going to do that. And you can use that source of artificial light instead of the natural light daily and extended for let's say, 30 minutes. So the studies have shown that you will have to gather approximately 100 1000s locks. That is the the unit of measuring the light per session in the morning, and how to know when you have gathered or accomplish that goal of 100 1000s. Locks. I have done my research and I found an app that is called light meter. And it's inexpensive, I think it's the lifetime access costed like $10, or $9. And it's pretty straightforward. You will, you will use your phone, your smartphone and your smartphones camera, and you can measure the light, you can place the camera towards the the source of light and they will give you a video how to do it. And you will measure how many locks you get per minute. And I have tested it over and over again. And if it's really bright outside, I get sometimes is like 100,000 Lux. So it would be enough to just it one minute in that light. But I was still sitting in the light for five minutes or 10 minutes no matter what that was like non negotiable. Some days, it was really, really really cloudy and really dark, really heavy gray clouds. So during those days, the amount of natural light that I was able to, to get outside was just 1000 Lux. And one of the days I even gathered like 750 lakhs. So why am I giving you all those details, because just I know how veterinarian brains works. And if it's like not bullet proof or whatever, you will find reasons to not do that. So I have done all the research for you. So you don't have to, to redo all those things. So when it's really really dark outside and it's only 1000 blocks, then we cannot sit outside for 100 minutes, it's we have other things to do. So in this case, in those cases, I will use one of my ring lights that I have available. Or I have a regular LED LED type of light above my head while I'm on the treadmill. So I measured that light, and if it's it has to come from above by the way, it has to mimic the the sun angle towards our eyes, those those cells are are sensitive to the to the angle of of the light waves coming into into our eyes. So it has to come from above as I said, As the sun is usually doing. So I measure that and if I'm sitting under that lamp and I'm walking on my treadmill in the morning, it's enough together like 20 minutes of that light. If I'm using the ring lights that I have in my office for my Zoom calls, then those are more powerful. So those with those in my eyes, I would definitely gather 100,000 locks In 15 minutes. So these are inexpensive tricks. And I've told you that you won't pay anything. But I think that would be the only the only situation if you aren't living up north in, in above the Arctic Circle, and you don't have natural light, yes, some investments might be in place to mimic that natural light. Yep. So each morning, waking up in the morning, gathering those 100,000 locks in my eyes as soon as possible after waking up and as soon as possible after the sunrise. And that, I think is the most important thing that you can do, why those cells are responsible for dopamine secretion. Those are responsible for cortisol, to start your day, we need cortisol. In the beginning of our days, we need that boost of cortisol. So that is healthy cortisol. Those cells are involved in starting the cascade of cortisol secretion in our adrenal glands. The those cells are responsible with our metabolism, those cells are responsible with our mood with our dopamine, with serotonin with everything. And those cells. And this technique done early in the morning are the first don't domino piece that will ensure a really nice night's sleep. Everything in our bodies is designed to follow the site circadian rhythm, the rhythm of nature, the rhythm of sunrise, and sunset. And all those things are so importantly, interconnected with each other, the muscles inside our eyes are dependent on those cells, we will be able to preserve our good vision long longer if we are doing this technique. Because those waves waves of light are again, influencing somehow the possibility of mitochondria inside our vision cells inside the muscles that are affecting our adaptations, apparatus inside our eyes, you know. So those muscles are not getting tired. The elasticity of our lens of our inside of our eyes is dependent, depending on those

Nadina Cojocaru 28:57
the metabolism inside is dependent, depending on that on those cells on those wave waves of light that are affecting those cells on our retina. So I don't want to get really technical about all those things, but I am so fascinated by how much in our bodies and in our brains is subjective to this one technique that we can do easily at home and it doesn't cost anything. So if you're living in a climate or in a somewhere on the globe, where is pretty straightforward to get sunlight into your eyes every morning, do that? For sure. So sunlight directly into your eyes immediately after waking up. With no sunglasses not staring Go towards the sun, but just getting, you know, relaxing your eyes allowing the eyes to look in the distance somehow towards the sun, but not directly into the sun. I think I've said it like 10 times, I will say it more, one more once more like don't stare directly to the sun. Don't do anything with your eyes, that is painful nothing because you only have those eyes, you know, for once, take good care of them. So look towards the light, but not directly into the sun allow those waves of, of sunlight to get into your eyes and to start the cascade of well being into your body. If you're thinking about the myelin, like 1000s of years, millennia of humans on this planet, until recently, this species human species has been dependent on the sun, rise, and some set all the temples, every religion, everything has deep protocols or deep routines, I don't know how to call them deep rituals that are always involving the sunrise and the sunset. Because that is the most important thing that will affect every other system in our bodies. I am so fascinated by that. So again, that is the first domino piece some directly in our eyes immediately after waking up with no excuses. And the second domino piece was and is equally important. Screens computer, phone screens, TV screens. If it's possible, stop using them two hours before going to sleep. If it's not possible, deem them really really really really low, change it change your colors on on your tablets, on your computers on your phone to the sleep mode or to do not disturb or to the night shift or whatever is called on your phone. So you will filter and deem them as low as possible. And I will tell you that when you will start to do the sun light in the morning. And then to stop using those screens. You will feel so good that you won't want to come back to that. I feel really how to call it I feel somehow sad. I am sad. Yeah, I am sad about depriving my body and my brain and my mind of that those hours of good sleep. If I tend to stay longer at the TV right now, and it happened in the last two months. I think it happened only three or four times. And I feel sad because I know how good it feels in my body to go to sleep early. And then to wake up refreshed by myself with no alarm at 5am. So no screen time or really deemed screen and no no really heavy or really Bright artificial lights, especially not above your hand two hours before going to bed. The third domino piece is or was for me to use a technique that is called non sleep deep rest. And it's, I've done a recording for you, you will find it in my free resources. On my website you will find the link to the free resources in the show notes of this podcast episode. So go to my website, www dot vet coach international.com Go to the free resources and download that free recorded pre recorded technique that is called SDR nonslip deep rest and as I said this free you give me your email address and I will give you you will pay me with your email address and you can unsubscribe from my email list whenever you like or whenever you get bored by by my emails. So go to my website download that is a downloadable file so you can have it on your phone. And that technique is phenomenal. Is a similar it's proven with scientific studies that utilizing this technique for 1820 30 minutes every day will improve again your energy level tremendously. So how to use this technique I will explain it in detail right now. And I have recorded some important safety message before recording the the technique itself. So don't freaking do that while driving because whatever. I am a hypnotist and I know how to reach your unconscious mind with my voice. So that will it's a technique that we have deep powerful healing ability for you for your brain for your mind it will create brain waves that are tremendous for healing and for energizing you and for getting to sleep or to just get rested. And as I said is powerful. So don't freaking mess with it by doing it or listening to it while driving. That is just plain and simple stupid because you might get injured. So do that. While you are not operating heavy machines or you are not doing like a surgery or something what the actual f we are not doing that folks. But you use that technique is I am also using it so I am listening to my own voice while I'm getting through that type of guided meditation or technique. I think just calling it meditation it doesn't. It doesn't show its real power. And

Nadina Cojocaru 39:00
I am using it all the time. I am using it for falling to sleep so you can use it you know you did the light in your eyes at the sun rise you did no screen or limited screen and no artificial lights from above before going to sleep and then I am putting my earbuds in and I am listening to my own dang and SDR to my own voice and fall asleep every single night. I am not it it's a type of body scan type of technique. And I usually don't get past my waist and I'm done. You know I'm sleeping really sleeping deep sleep. I have used the same technique I will I will tell you about that about Are you waking up in the middle of the night a little bit, a little bit later. So let me back, back, back up a little bit. So this technique can be used also in the middle of the day, or in the start of your day. So if you didn't have a really nice, good, really nice night's sleep, and you're feeling still tired when you're waking up, I know what is what has happened. So just tell me, send me some emails, if you still want to hear more about the sleep and what things I discovered during my, my own journey with my own sleep, and the science behind all those kinds of things while we wake up and we are still tired and so on. It's on it's on. So I will, I will make another podcast episode if that is of interest. So you can use the same technique and SDR. And if you don't like my voice or something, just go on YouTube and find it. And studies have shown that utilizing this technique for 20 to 30 minutes is more beneficial to restore your brain your energy level, then a nap. If you are a Napper, if you're a person who naps and wakes up restored after a nap, by all means continue with your naps. But the vast majority of people are not restored by a nap. So they're waking up more more tired than they went to sleep before napping. For me personally, naps are not an option, I really, really rarely find a nap that is not affecting my night's sleep or is restorative for me. So I've tried and it's not a thing for me. And instead of a nap, if your energy level is getting low let's say late afternoon, just do this technique, sit on the chair and do the technique. And if you're doing the technique, and you want to stay awake and not fall to fall asleep, then I will explain in the in the SDR file as well, you will just have to shift the way you're breathing. So it's pretty, pretty damn easy to understand how to breathe when you want to fall asleep. And when you want to stay awake. It's really easy. It's something so so so available, it's free. So go to my website again and grab it. So an SDR and that is the third the third piece of the domino. So the first was the sunlight directly into my eyes immediately after waking up and as close as possible of the sunrise five to 30 minutes of the direct exposure to intense morning light. The second one was screen time reducing the screen time reducing the colors of the screen and reducing the TV time or you know those those kinds of colors into my eyes during the evenings and the third one is an SDR I use that technique to fall asleep every single night. The fourth piece of the Domino was waking up in the middle of the night and not being able to follow us back to sleep because I have been doing that. And I hear that from a lot of my clients who are doing that. So what's the what's the solution for waking up in the middle of the night? First I want to emphasize know how important it is to not to judge yourself for doing that? And to see what is your natural sleep rhythm? So what do I mean by that we all have our type of sleep, sleep studies done during them, you know, retrospective studies by researching how our ancestors were sleeping, what, what was their sleep patterns, discovered that throughout this species history and evolution we were supposed or our bodies or our organisms, our animal bodies are waking up in the middle of the night, some of us are doing that. Or better said, the vast majority of us are doing that. So, again, that's a normal thing. Apparently, people were waking up around three or 4am. And they even had like a chunk of normal, or, you know, sometimes they had they engage in, in sexual activities in the middle of the night. That was what was happening, or sometimes just using the bathroom or going to pee, for instance, so that, again, a normal body function. So the problem is when we have some thoughts about how our sleep or how our normal or restful sleep is supposed to look like. And if for me, it's totally normal to wake the eff out up in the middle of the night, then my body will do that. So I am waking up consistently between three or 4am I using the bathroom, I'm coming back to bed, and then to fall back asleep. If I feel that my brain is to activate it, then for sure I put again, my my earbuds or my my, my air pods in and I start to listen to the SDR as I said, is a downloadable file, so you can have it on your phone, my phone is really dark I have during the night, my phone is the light on my phone is zero, you know, I deemed it all together on that scale of, of brightness is like no light there is just dark. So I have it because I have listened to it before falling asleep. So I'm just pressing again on that file that will play immediately in my earbuds and I'm falling back back to sleep. I think in the last two months I needed once to really listen to to the to the audio file for going

Nadina Cojocaru 48:28
for falling asleep in the middle of the night or in the middle of the night. And once when I was falling asleep in the beginning of the night, so that happened a total of twice, you know, so I didn't I was not asleep after the first round and then I really sent to it. And then I was I was fast asleep in the middle of the second one. So that is that is for sure. The fourth domino piece that is really really important to regulate our metabolism, our sleep, our men mental health, everything. The fifth one would be to get sunlight into your eyes around sunset. I personally, I personally haven't been using that. For me it was really important to consistently start with getting some into my eyes in the morning. I got reports from my clients who have kids and I have talked to them about this technique over and over and over and over again. So or if they take their kids for a walk into the sunset light, their kids are getting to sleep really easily. So no more tantrums, of course no more screen time after coming back home just reading or doing something to continue that but their sleep improved so much after just two evenings. I mean come on, it's ridiculous. So sign into our eyes in the morning and sunrise and sunset light into our eyes. As I said for me that that is not necessarily what I have been doing. Because my sleep has improved a lot. And I'm waking up, rested and no problems whatsoever in the last two months, and I probably got some sunlight around sunset into my eyes, probably three times in the last two months. It's not that easily available from my from my yard, it's blocked a little bit so I was looking in that direction. And now it's is getting more and more impossible to fix to get that that kind of light because the sunset is later and later so I would have to stay awake for pretty long to get those waves into my eyes. Because as I said I live in Sweden and the sunset is around I think 10 or 11 Right now I haven't checked it recently but it is getting later and later or earlier in the morning. So at some point we will have the sunset at 11:30pm and the sun dries at 2am or something which is ridiculous. So not necessarily a really dark thing. So I have light blocking blinds and I have light blocking mask on my eyes. So that was as I said the part of the protocol that I wasn't using. And the last one that I want to leave you with is not having TV or phones or night lamps, preferably on during the night. That affects again, those cells in our eyes, it will create create a cascade of not restful sleep whatsoever. It has to be dark. If you have kids that are sleeping with a night lamp on try to wean them out of that and I understand kids are sometimes afraid of the dark. But is is affecting you can google it it's they're calling it a myopia epidemic in kids because they use the screens a lot they are not getting natural light every day. And they are sleeping with a night lamps on during during the night. So the light during the night. The light will go through your eyelids especially if you have thin eyelids it will affect your retinal cells. So your brain will still perceive those those light waves that will affect your sleep and the your capacity of resting during sleep. So really important to consider that and if I am going to sleep and my husband is still looking at something on on his phone or on his tablet, I have my eye mask on. I have a really precious silk silk him Your silky eyemask and I will use it for the beginning of the night when he might look at his phone steel or, or using his tablet. So those were the domino piece pieces that are so important for your health, for your metabolism for your well being, to fight depression, to fight insomnia and I will highly, highly, highly encourage you to do those things. And start by the first first domino piece which is get sunlight, natural sunlight into your eyes as soon as possible. After the sunrise and after your being awake. If you have been working overnights and you are going and you are, you know driving or going back home in the morning, when you are supposed to sleep in this particular case, use really dark sunglasses. So you are blocking as much as possible have those wave light waves. So you are able to fall asleep, go home, no screens, nothing in the morning. And if possible, take a really hot bath or shower. Preferably like two hours before going to sleep or one hour before going to sleep. So your body temperature will adjust to the sleepiness you can even use sunglasses inside of a supermarket, if you're stopping by by a gas station or something, don't get try to not get any sunlight into your eyes. If you want to sleep before, after going home, really important. So do that. And really dark blinds inside your house, if you want to sleep after after a night shift more about that in a in a future podcast episode how to address those instances when we have to shift our circadian rhythm and what to do about it. So I hope that will just be your interest. And I deeply encourage you to, to follow my lead and to return to the things that our human bodies were designed to, to be doing. And that is logging or worshipping or how the FBI wants to call it the sun.

Nadina Cojocaru 58:24
That was all for today. Remember, you can work with me, go to my website or go to to the show notes and book a free coaching session with me it's 45 minutes, and we get to know each other and see if we are a good fit, if you are a fit for working with me and to be part of the sparkly that groups Group. And what do I mean by that is I am always working one on one currently, it's May 2023. I don't know which crazy ideas will I will have in the future. But right now what I feel it's more the most useful for my clients. They all have one on one sessions coaching sessions with me. And then we have one weekly group coaching session when they all come together. And we are exploring things that are helping each other on our journeys into this best vet profession to make it as joyful and sparkly as possible. While losing some weight if that is your interest. Another way of working with me is to hire me to do a training for your team for your clinic. And people have been so happy for hiring me to teach you some stress management tools. that's specially designed for you for your practice, you can give my contact information to your practice manager, or the CEO of your clinic or the manager of your clinic, or the person who is in charge. And to find a way to decrease the stress level, in, in this profession, and especially in your work environment, because you matter, and your colleagues matter, and your patients matter and your pet owners matter. And it's really important to have a harmonious relationship with them. So you can give them the booking, you know, that free session link, or they can contact me, they can send me an email at info at Back Coach international.com. And we'll chat. That was all for today. It was a long one. But I really, really enjoyed sharing with you all some of my sporty ideas and the way I fixed my over 30 years of challenging sleep. So, so, so good. It's possible if it was possible for me, it's for sure possible for you as well. If you are dealing with that problem. And it's not only for the sleep, it's for your wellbeing, for your mood for your metabolism, and for feeling so much better in your brain in your body in in your life in general. Lots of sparkly hugs my friends, and see you around

Episode 44 - Are you a Sparkly Vet? ✨

In this episode, I want to talk about what makes a 'Sparkly' Vet!

WHAT YOU WILL DISCOVER 

- A list of 10 things that make you a sparkly vet!

- When we incorporate the whole of ourselves we become very sparkly!

- How it's NEVER too late to become a sparkly vet!

LINKS SPECIFIC TO THIS EPISODE

👉 Book a free call with me here: ⁠https://calendly.com/vetcoachinternational/45min⁠

👉 Sign Up for my Ethical Selling Webinar: ⁠https://us06web.zoom.us/webinar/register/WN_Macu29dVSGeuSdurEqFSbw

HOW TO FIND ME OUTSIDE THE PODCAST

Find all the ways that you can interact with me here: ⁠https://linktr.ee/vetcoach⁠ (free resources can be found here)

Full Transcript

Nadina Cojocaru  00:01

Welcome to weight loss for small animal vets podcast. Hi, I'm Nadina Cojocaru, DVM, and certified life and weight coach.

Nadina Cojocaru  00:15

Hello, friends, welcome to episode 44 of the podcast. Are you sparkly vet? How are you doing friends? What's up, I just came up with this idea that if you are a sparkly vet, you have to fulfill some criteria. So I created a list of criteria that needs to be fulfilled all of them in order to be a sparkly vet. And as I said, all of them has to be fulfilled. You are a sporting event, when you are able to do all 10 of them. And let's directly dive in, and let's discuss about them. Contact me on social media on Instagram at vet coach international or on Facebook, at vet life coaching or vet coach International. And let me know what you think. And if you think that is bananas, and that is impossible, I have a secret for you. My clients are sparkling events, and we work towards or they want to find their sparkles again, because some of those points on that list are not fulfilled yet. And I can tell you that it is possible. I want to sell you on the universal possibility. That means even you, you also can be a sparkling vet, that's a universal possibility. Because everybody can have all of those 10 points from my sparkly vet criteria. So let's dive in. Number one, the most important of them, you don't talk to yourself inside your head as an aihole. So you are not you are stopping the intent. They internalized me and voice that is chatter inside your brain all the freaking time. That's the first one. Number two, you love going to your vet job every single day that you work. Again, you love going to your vet job every single day that you work. Number three, you love coming home from your vet job and meet your family. And that family might be just an empty house with three plans or even not that or some pets, or just your home, your house your bed. Number four you know how to take care of your nervous system when it gets activated or triggered. And, look, we all have monsters in our closets. And some of us have big T traumas. Some of us have smaller T traumas. And those experiences shaped us in who we are today. And it's important to know what your body's stress response. And to know when your body or your nervous system gets activated, how to put some hormone on it, how to soothe how to take care of your nervous system. Because we are humans and we are not robots we react our nervous system gets activated. And then we get to decide and if you're a sparkly vet you will know exactly how to take care of your nervous system because you understand your nervous system reactions and you know how to counterbalance those reactions. So that's number four. Number five your economy is not creating anxiety. Of course, your mindset matters. Of course, you can have anxiety around money, if you even if you are making millions and millions and millions of dollars or euros or Swedish crowns or whatever every year. Of course that matters, but as perky Yvette makes a good living from their job, for them and for their family. And by the way, if you're not happy with your current level of income, and you haven't registered to attend the ethical selling in vet profession, what are you waiting for? That training is happening this Sunday, so in a few days, on April 9, the link will be in the show notes. And the price for it is 10 euros or to translate into united state dollars that your state dollars is 10 point 85 $10.85. American dollars, the replay will be available. So go registered to the training, ethical selling in the vet profession or for VET professionals. That is happening in a few days. Really, really, really important. And if you're listening to this podcast somewhere in the future, you can go to my website and probably in one month or two it will be available then there on the wait website. So you can purchase it directly from from the website. But if you haven't, and you want to ask me questions directly, while or live in into the the training is a webinar form, I cannot see you so and nobody else will be able to see you. If you're not willing to be promoted as a panelist and to come live and to answer some to have a discussion with me if you have questions. But if it if you are you, you are not willing to do that, you can ask questions in the q&a. And nobody else will see you. You can even change your name. If you don't like any other people know, to see you or to see your real name on the webinar in the webinar chat or in the q&a. So as I said, if you're not happy with your level of income from your vet business, from your vet job, even if you are an associate or an employee, go find the link in the show notes. Give me 10 euros is like a fancy expresso and I will teach you how to make more money how to create more abundance by selling and that I mean by knowing how to sell your knowledge, your services in a way that is ethical. And that will bring a lot of abundance for you for your family and for generations to come. If you're interested in having kids or to to create a generational abundance. So that was number five. Number six, you live and work in an environment that is not toxic. That is not abusive. Sparkles may create explosions with flammable gases or fumes. So

Nadina Cojocaru  09:13

I think it's really important to create or to to try to find or to try and to find Oh, a work environment that is appropriate for your sparkles because I will say it over and over and over again. Some people are toasters and our mind our body our type of interacting with other people is like an apple. So if a team of apples He hires a toaster, that toaster will feel really inadequate in a team of apples and the apples will try to change the toaster and to mold the toaster in an apple shape. So that's why that creates frictions, and that creates unnecessary negativity. So go find your team of toasters, if you are a toaster. And of course, I'm not comparing humans with apples or toasters, you get the metaphor Come on. So when you are living and working, and again, I am addressing living and working because we are whole human beings, we cannot be sparkly, if half of our lives are in a black dark hole with no sunshine inside, and just a lot of negativity. So we have to think about ourselves as a whole human being, that has a job that they like they adore, and they have a life outside the job that they like, and they adore. Even if that job that we like or we adore, takes just, let's say eight hours of our time, then we go home, and then we have another life and even if that life at home involves cuddling on the sofa, with your beloved pets, and you love this life, yes, you're a sparkly vet, embrace it. When we live in war, working in an environment that is not toxic, we are not afraid to quote unquote, fire or release people, situations, clients, workplaces, bosses, employees, that are mismatches. We love them, and we let them go. So that is what I mean by the apples and, and toasters metaphor. Number seven, you don't use food, especially poor quality foods in volumes. You don't use alcohol or other illegal substances to deal with the stress. I don't have anything against getting pleasure from foods or to have an experience of having a really nice alcoholic or non alcoholic beverage with your food to increase the experience of the app even if I am personally not drinking alcohol anymore. And I wouldn't put that substance again in my mouth ever. From gazillions of reasons. And I I am not against having delicious foods to enjoy. But I don't see a sparkly event using volumes of poor quality foods to deal with stress or with their lives. As partly that has only the tools to do it without using food or poor quality foods in volumes, alcohol or other substances usually illegal to cope with their lives. Number eight you take care of your body and again that is related to the previous point. You take care of your body by offering delicious and nutritious and pleasurable experiences to your body. Not only based in food, but in movement in interactions with animals with other humans in interactions with you, because you are an have a deep well of intelligence and sparkles You are not afraid of being alone, you are not afraid to be with your loved ones you are not afraid to be at work you are not. You take pleasure from all those interactions and all those experiences. So, we take care of the wholeness of our body's nervous systems, heads, families, and our, our whole experience in a pleasurable delicious, nutritious way. And that might involve being able to reconnect with your deepest desires, with the desires for having a different type of sexual life. If you are still consider yourself a sexual being. There are so that so you know, a lot of biases that exist in our society, that the the older we get, the less less sexual we are, which is not necessarily true. Our bodies are capable of receiving sexual pleasure, sensual sexual pleasure, no matter the age, even if we are now 95 years old. So if you still consider yourself, a sexual being, that is an important part of your wholeness as a sparkly event, to have that need met, and to find solutions, to take care of that pleasure that you are depriving yourselves from right now, from various reasons. Sometimes, because you don't like how your body looks like as if your body is not capable of receiving pleasure, no matter the shape, the weight, or whatever. So when we incorporate the wholeness of us, we become really sparkly. So, let's take care of all our body's needs. And to know that, yes, no matter the age, we are still capable of giving, receiving pleasure, deliciousness and really good, delightful experiences, no matter as I said, the age, the the romantic relationships or the lack thereof, in our lives. Everything counts. So number eight, we have to take care of your our bodies or our nervous systems as a whole, including movement interactions with animals, with other humans with nature's with our bodies, with our sexuality with our sensuality, and with our pleasure that comes from extremely nourishing foods and, and experiences. Number eight, number nine, sorry, you're able to deeply connect with your own body, with your own mind with your intelligence with your internal wisdom and you are able to connect and read your patients body language and cues. So,

Nadina Cojocaru  19:06

when you are a sparkler that this is really really really really really important. You will stop interpreting lab results and charts and Miss extremely vital information from that animal. You cannot be a sparkly vet and you cannot be connected with yourself with your bodies and really safe in yourself in your role in your body. Then in your relationship with a pet with a pet owner with your bosses with your colleagues. If you are missing like obvious skull fractures, you are missing. You are ignoring the cues and you just recommend the firm trimming when the cat is covered in growth grossly mated hair, you know, like, like just a big, big blanket in really disgusting hair, or fur. And even if you are like sedating that cat for trimming the floor, then you are not seeing the freaking tumor inside the cat's mouth or you miss the Tooth Resorption lesions inside the cat's mouth are the fractures, the fractured teeth, or really disgusting blood samples for or kidney values. So that doesn't happen when you are, as I said, safe in your knowledge in your body, in your relationship with your pets with the pet owners, with your colleagues, with your boss or with your co workers. That doesn't happen because another especially especially important point is that doesn't happen when you don't have those internalized oppression, oppressive voices inside your head, when your head is clear, from the internal internal or selfish self inflicted pain and self inflicted abuse with your own words, all those narratives inside your head, about your body, about your life, about your knowledge about everything. Those things are not happening because you are seeing them. And I've seen it over and over again, both in me both in my my clients who have extremely pleasurable experiences with their connection with the animal, being able to help those animals to to connect and to communicate with the pet owners. And to know when an interaction with a colleague for example, is not okay. And when they are abused or they are being bullied by their colleagues. And number 10, again, really, really important to be a spark event. You take time off you take holidays, you need time to replenish air recharge. So you can start again, Fresh Start still loving and enjoying your work your life that is adamant that is extremely important. And if you again, tell me that you don't have money to take time off. I will point you again to the course that is happening this Sunday about ethical selling for VET professionals. Really important topic. Really, really important topic. As I said, all of these 10 points need to happen and are mandatory for creating a sparkly vetlife. And again, as it's never too late to start enjoying your sexuality if that is the thing that blew your mind the most from all this experience. It's never too late to become a sparkly vet. It's essential to learn these skills as soon as possible. I wished I knew all those things. When I first became a vet and somehow I had Have this underlying belief that I need it all. Especially vacations and holidays, I am, I am blessed to, to be able to do that. Not because I have more money in my life sometimes, or there were moments in my life where the money were really tight. We probably bought our groceries for the last week of the month on a credit card, that happened. And yet, I knew that I needed holidays, and we made it happen in why one way or another, it doesn't have to be really expensive, it doesn't have to be it's, it's something that that will just changing the scenery. It's so important, not necessarily, you know, you don't take holidays to fix your roof. Don't do that. Fix your roof while you are working, you know, go and take a break from your house from your life from you know, just take a break. And you won't be able to do that. And you won't be able to enjoy the break, no matter how expensive is that holiday. If you take with you the same mindset. If you're not enjoying your vetlife your if you're not enjoying your home life, you know, and I am not talking about enjoying abusive workspaces. I've said it over and over and over again. But if you are a SPARQL event, you will recognize when a workplace is a mismatch for you. And that is nothing wrong. Sometimes if there is something wrong with those people, sometimes that is true. Some people are not nice towards other human beings. When we all know that those employers or those workspaces or those Abused abusive co workers exist for sure. But when you are responding to that you don't internalize that or you have the tools to filter through that garbage and to move on. So as I said, is never too late to become a sparkly vet, and to have an amazing rest of your vet career. Have a wonderful week. And hope to see you at the webinar, ethical selling in the vet profession. Lots of loving hugs

Episode 43 - How's Your Water?

In this episode, I am sharing with you the importance of water! 💦 Why we need to focus on the first 10 hours of our day, and what is best to drink and why!

WHAT YOU WILL DISCOVER 

- Why you should be focussing on your water intake in the first 10 hours after you wake up

- What the minimum baseline is for your water intake (there's a formula!)

- Hydration liquids and what you need to consider with caffeine

LINKS SPECIFIC TO THIS EPISODE

👉 Book a free call with me here: ⁠https://calendly.com/vetcoachinternational/45min⁠

👉 Email me directly about training: ⁠[email protected]⁠

HOW TO FIND ME OUTSIDE THE PODCAST

Find all the ways that you can interact with me here: ⁠https://linktr.ee/vetcoach⁠ (free resources can be found here)

Full Transcript

Hello, friends, welcome to episode 43 of the podcast. Hey, how are you doing with your water? How are you doing friends in general, I mean, I am getting more and more on to something because I started to do some trainings with veterinary clinics. So I reserve like 60 to 90 minutes of their time, usually over lunch break. And we discuss about stress relieving tools for vets, vet professionals vet teams. So by the way, if you are interested in that, or if your clinic or your practice manager is interested in that, to offer that to to all the employees, please contact me, you have all the contact details in the show notes. Or ask your practice manager or your business manager or who is in charge of doing those, those things for the employees to book a free conversation with me, you have the link in it's a link to my Calendly My Online Business calendar. So you can pick a time like 45 minutes, and we discuss and we see which formula a formula is the best for you and your team and your colleagues. And as I said, we just get to chat together and see what applies for you and your clinic. And what are the problems that you are constantly dealing with in your day to day life as a veterinarian, and as a person because if we divide our personal life with our vet job, we are humans, we cannot lobotomize ourselves and just going in as a robot closing in everything are closing out or shutting out everything that is or pushing out everything that is not related to that specific situation when we are a job or at home. So we get to discuss and I will help you with really easy stress relieving techniques that work under one minute. And those are really fun, those create so much, so much giggles or so many giggles, because you will have your secret language to to discuss with each other, and the front desk people and the vet technicians or the vet nurses will all have some ideas how to deal with their part of the stress or the people who are answering the phones or veterinarians and how to think about the cases the case loads, the clients and so on. And as I said I was doing those trainings more and more and I just adore them. Because for me, it's such a such an important thing to bring to bring some sparkles Yes, in into my colleagues lives because I really love this profession. I really love the humans who are working in this profession. And I just want more and more of our veterinarians to fall in love again with this profession. And to not see it as a dreadful thing that are that is killing their sparkles. So as I said, Just tell your practice manager to contact me if you're interested in doing a training over lunch sometimes. And everything is on Zoom. Every every everybody can be on their own devices on their own phones. Or if you have a conference room that you can connect one computer through that video system that is also how I did it a few times. So as I was discussing with with the people it's becoming more and more apparent that we get more and more angry. clients or really obnoxious people who think that they are entitled to behave really badly with us, with the front desk, people with our vet techs or our vet nurses. And sometimes I've seen it over and over again, people think they don't have any resource to deal with that situation. Or there are situations where when the employees are not allowed to fire one client or two, or to say something about that behavior, and some of those behaviors are really abusive. So as I said, In my previous podcast about how to take away all those pet owners that are not kind to us, it's, it's a really deep problem. And it's, it's something that it's it's a given. And I will give you some, some some example, for instance, one of my business coaches, who is a really smart person, recorded a podcast and gave her as an example. If you meet a dentist on a hike, you won't put the dentist to, to check your mouth. Because that is not professional. And you as a coach, you should for sure, like leave your if the person wants to work with you as a life coach, then give, give them your calendar link. And then they can book a meeting because it's more professional to be at home in a working type of environment because no dentist would check other person's teeth on a hike. And I was like, Yeah, except if we are veterinarians, hello, everybody's expects us to check their pets, check their horses, check their to give them free medicine to give them refills to to do all kinds of shenanigans while we are on a hike. More than that, we usually don't admit that we are veterinarians, because we are so sick and tired of people taking advantage of our time and have no respect for our private life. That is that is actually a big, big, big, big problem in this profession. So yes, probably a dentist wouldn't check the teeth of a person while they are on a hike. But a veterinarian has or veterinarians in general we have big problems saying no forks. So by the way, I can teach you to say no or to empower your front desk people how to how to deal with those stressful situations. And I want to offer you, for instance, if that happens to you and by the way, I know it happens if you still tell people that you are a veterinarian and you are on a hike or you on on a flight even a long flight and people ask you what you are doing and you are telling them that you are a veterinarian and they ask you for medical advice. I usually tell them really bluntly that I am not I am not licensed to give you medical advice. And that is that is not how that is not professional. And I would refer them to their veterinarian because I'm not licensed in other states then then Sweden currently and I am not licensed to perform veterinary medicine outside of my clinic that is reason for termination of my employment. And I use this because my boss is really really nice boss. It's not it's not about that but usually that takes away the the sting of it. Another way of to stop those those

Nadina Cojocaru 10:00
comments is to tell them that you are not covered by insurance. And you are not covered by insurance to practice medicine, or if something happens, because I had clients who told me that they were asked to give a horse an injection, after after a hunt, a hunting event. And they were like, WTF, it's like I'm in another state. I'm not even in my state. So, of course, I'm not licensed to perform anything. And if you as a pet owner, do that are performing that medical procedure. Your responsibilities are not that high, as if I as a veterinarian would perform a medical procedure in a state or in a country that I'm not licensed into, because that removes my license from my original state. So as I said, tangents. So in this episode, I wanted to discuss a little bit about water. And I saw a study done on veterinary students, and they were not able to drink water or to have lunch consistently. And I think that is that is that is against the human rights. I and I am not afraid of using big terms. Because this is a real problem if we skip lunch sometimes because we choose to because we want to go home earlier. And we make a conscious decision about that. That's one thing. But if we constantly can't take lunch, or can start to drink water, that is not good. That is not good. That is that is, as I said, That's against the human rights. We have to take breaks, we have to drink water. And I want to bring the water into into discussion because I want to give you some more recent numbers about what are our body's needs for water and why. And I will start by saying that the most important thing is to think about the first 10 hours after you're waking up. And the vast majority of our water intake or our minimum baseline needs to happen that ingestion need needs to happen in the first 10 hours after we wake up that is related with the circadian rhythm that is related with hormones and how they affect our kidney function that is really really important to remember. So in the first in the first 10 hours after we wake up when our bodies are starting to wake up as well. We are supposed to drink eight ounces of fluid per hour or 236 milliliters of water per hour for the first 10 hours and that is just the minimum baseline. Of course you are if you are thirsty you you have to remember if you are thirsty, you're already dehydrated. What happens is that and I will take a sip of water by the way. I drink a lot of water because I talked a lot during my coaching session so I drink much more than that amount of water when I have back to back a day of coaching. So that is just the baseline. If you are thirsty after those first 10 hours, by all means drink more water. What you have to have in mind is it doesn't necessarily matter how Oh, you drink it if you if you are drinking, in theory, they say that you have to sip it, sip through it, you know, take small sips through the day, but drink how, how is preferably for you or how you can do it, you can gulp in yourself some water or CPS, that amount through your day, and so on. So it's it's really important to remember all all the people that I talked to, in all those clinics, they were like, what is happening? What are you saying, and I am seeing some really solid scientific studies that are done about our minimum baseline of water intake. And yes, if you drink that water, you have to pee, and that is perfectly normal. What happens after the first 10 hours during the day is that the kidney function is different, the the absorption, absorption of water is a little bit different. And if you are a person who wakes up and can't fall asleep back asleep in the middle of the night, you would like to prevent that from happening. So if you're going up to pay it in the middle of the night, if that disturbs your, you're sleeping, that that is not optimal for your, your rest time or for your body. So try to keep that in mind to to drink that amount of water throughout the day. So So you have as little as possible after those 10 hours. And if you exercise if you work out the minimum amount that there is a formula. And this formula says that if you're thinking in pounds, and ounces, you divide your body weight in pounds with 30. And then you will have the amount of ounces of water that you are supposed to drink every 15 to 20 minutes of exercise and to translate that in milliliters and kilograms, we are supposed to drink two milliliters of water per kilogram body weight every for every 15 to 20 minutes of exercise that is on top of the other baseline intake of water and that doesn't take into consideration how warm it is outside if you are in a sauna or doing something like that, if if you are exercising in a really hot environment, so and it doesn't take into consideration of course, your personal perspiration rate or that is individually designed is so so it depends how your body will lose water through perspiration. So remember that the moment we are dehydrated we think slower. So much slower. We get cranky we get foggy in our brains. And it doesn't it affects our mental well being our physical well being so pleased if you if you can just take one, you know if you can make such a common rule in your clinic with your colleagues to remind each other to help each other to drink water. Please do that.

Nadina Cojocaru 19:52
And as I said the minimum baseline for the first 10 hours a week hours Get in as much as possible have that, that water in your system as soon as possible after waking up and think about if you're drinking caffeine, caffeine, like coffee, or tea, or even a coke or something like that, that will add, you have to add at least eight ounces per each portion or each coffee, each caffeinated tea that you are drinking. Because that or to not speak about alcohol, that is another can of worms to open up right now. But those are those dehydrate those substances or those beverages dehydrate our, our bodies, they are not considered necessarily a source of liquids. If you're drinking non caffeinated drinks, those might be considered as hydration liquids. Yes. So that is about water. And there are as I said, a lot of Kleenex or a lot of colleagues who are not drinking water, I see you, I just see you it's it's such such a such a pain because I know how I feel in my body when I'm done not drinking water, that is one of my most important self care, things that that I do, I drink water I have all the time my favorite water with me. And it's, I feel like I feel like crap, if I'm not drinking enough water. So remember, eight ounces per hour in the first 10 hours, or 236 milliliters of our per hour. Or if you're exercising, divide the body weight in pounds by 30. And that is the amount in ounces that you are supposed to drink every 15 to 20 minutes. And if we are talking in kilograms or the metric system, two milliliters of water per kilogram body weight for every 15 to 20 minutes of exercise and that is on top of the minimum baseline. So, drink your water this is important, it will help you cope with your pet owners with what is happening in your clinic. So much better, it improves your immune system, it improves your mental function and it it takes away the brain fog you will for sure drink if you drink water for sure you will eat less because the vast majority of time when we are reaching for food we usually are dehydrated. So that is that is important. How about which type of water we drink? I am what temperature I would encourage you to drink water that is at the body temperature or a little bit like room temperature at least. And if you like to drink really hot water or really cold water that will impair the absorption of water in your body and there are mechanisms that or the the gut mucous membranes are really sensitive to temperature. So that's why we have that. That feeling of having a bag of water in our stomach if we are gulping in a lot of cold water and we feel it under a long period of time. So everything in our bodies are more prolonged to absorb the water from our gut system from our intestinal system and from our digestive tract. And those are time dependent, they are more efficient in the morning. And, or you're in the first 10 hours of the day, the most efficient in the morning. So think about that, drink your water, sip your water, have your bottles with water, if you prefer to drink it really hot or really cold, remember that they hurt a little bit your your mucous membranes, but if you cannot drink it in in another way, it's better than nothing. So it's, it's a personal preference, how you drink it. And I would rather see you drink more water at the temperature that you like, then to not drink at all. So that being said, that was what I had in mind to discuss with you about water. Remember that you find a lot of free resources on my website at WWW dot vet Coach international.com and please share, download and rate and review this podcast if you haven't done it yet. In this way it will show for more and more colleagues. And if you would like to get your sparkles back and to feel more more calm and more willing to go to work every day. Book of a consult with me, it's it's free, you find the link in the show notes. And I will for sure even if we are not working together I will for sure point you in the right direction. Remember to discuss with your clinic manager or your practice manager about having a training that teaches your tools that can relieve stress in as little as one minute 30 seconds. You have some you have a training in the free resources if you're if you want to start somewhere. So those are available on my website. If you go to www dot that Cochin international.com You you will find the free resources and you will have a list there you will get all of them and there is something that is called three tools to deal with stress in veterinary profession. So, that is what I am referring to. So if you want a more personalized and input in person meeting room, a Zoom meeting for the whole clinic, discuss with your clinic manager so they can contact me and we will meet on Zoom. So you can you can get more sparklers in your clinic as well. That was all for today folks. Love you. Lots of loving hugs hugs

Episode 42 - So much more than JUST FOOD

In this episode, I am talking about the brain 'fog' that is the negative voices in our heads - it's not about food, it's about being able to silence the racing voices in our heads, and reconnecting with our bodies (because we are the expert in our own bodies!)

WHAT YOU WILL DISCOVER

- How our internal voices have created a 'fog' that affects how we deal with food and drink, and how we behave

- When the fog lifts, we can see the facts, and we realise we have so much more brain space!

- We have the ability to reconnect with our bodies (and to connect with our animals on a deeper level again)

LINKS SPECIFIC TO THIS EPISODE

👉 Sign up for my free webinar - https://us06web.zoom.us/webinar/register/WN_R2ml-oWRSR6lDDC4EruKkg

👉 Want to join the next round of Sparkly Vets Group Coaching? Book your free call here: https://calendly.com/vetcoachinternational/45min

HOW TO FIND ME OUTSIDE THE PODCAST

Find all the ways that you can interact with me here: https://linktr.ee/vetcoach (all of my free resources can be found here too)

Nadina Cojocaru 00:00
And welcome to weight loss for small animal vets podcast. I am Nadina Cojocaru, DVM, and certified life and weight coach.

Nadina Cojocaru 00:14
Hello, friends, welcome to episode 42 of the podcast, so much more than just food. How are you doing friends? What's up? Today I want to just talk about something that I've realised and as soon as I have this, this inspired idea. I, I just wanted to shout out from the top of my lungs and the bottom of my heart to everybody. And what I realised is that especially for women, especially for women in vet prof in the vet profession. I think we are because of the all the internalised sexism internalised oppression, about our bodies, about how we are supposed to behave, how we are supposed to look like how we are supposed to talk to speak, to address other people to be more feminine, or more masculine, or if more assertive, less assertive, more confident, less confident, more girly, more lady, like you'll get the point. So because of all those internalised oppressive voices, that now we believe that are the absolute truth, and that is how it's supposed to be like that we have those voices, about our bodies, about our abilities, our intellect, and so on and so on. We have, as I called it, the, the veil or a fog, you know, imagine that our brain is like in a fog. And that reflects also on how we eat on how we drink on how, which behaviours we have. So the moment when the fog or the veil, that veil that we have over our eyes or over our, our, our intellect, our intuition over our, our just ability to see the facts around us. The moment that that fogginess is cut off, we realise that we have so much brain space, we have so much places placed in our lives for just living in alignment with who we are. And those seem like okay, big words that have like What the f meaning. So to give you a specific example you will know if if that veil is just lifting, you will know you will really know if it's time to stay or go in a relationship. You will know when it's time to move on from a specific romantic relationship or even a partnership or an I'm speaking about a business partner partnership or to exit or contractual relationship with, let's say workplace, so switching jobs. And I think that there is a reason why 97% of women have those internalised hateful voices inside their heads about their bodies about their abilities in general. This is one of the most systematic

Nadina Cojocaru 04:56
abuses that were done to the or, or war were performed the mass scale of this abuse about humans born in female bodies. So it's it's unspeakable to take half more than half of our population of a species and treat systematically half of the population in this way that we reach this point right now, where we cannot see or cannot think differently about, as I said about our bodies that that pisses me off tremendously. So is, as I stated before that that systematic abuse started somewhere in in the early probably even even earlier than that, like 12 century. And and it's, it's such a such a shame that we don't realise, or more of us don't realise that we have that veil on our brains. So all of that fogginess, let's call it like that, because what that does, that creates a buzz, a constant buzz that you know, all the times all the time it says Oh, you look fat, you know, you you catch your, your glimpse in the mirror, and your brain is like, Oh, your face is fat. Or oh, you have wrinkles. Oh, you have aged Oh, what a soggy, saggy, Otter saggy skin, you have on your on your face, or Oh, look at your saggy skin on your belly or on your thighs. Oh, it you have cellulite and then you have, you know, you behaved you behaved badly with that pet owner. And oh, you you totally missed that diagnosis. And, and so on. So on. So that constant buzz, start with or it's based, it starts with that image of our bodies, I cannot even talk about it more than I, I am already doing it. I think I will, I will just be the like the drum because that's the that's the, you know, the, the most important thing thing in our lives that we have to address. And sometimes it's not even recognised as abuse. You know, it's like, all those positive shoulds oh, you should drink more water. Oh, you should exercise more. It sounds delightful, isn't it, it's like for your health. Those things come from that internalised idea that you are bad your body is is ugly, your your and you have to do something to change it, that worthiness of of love care. And to to just have fun just because you're born on this planet. So that in impacts you know, our ability of connecting with, with other humans our our ability of connecting with the animals with our patients, which is important because they don't speak so. That that is that is the the origin of the imposter syndrome as well. That is an idea that is created by the patriarchy or the patriarchal ideas that women are imposters because they are they don't belong in academia, they don't belong in our intellectual context, and so on and so on. So our rights were systematic li diminished at the largest scale possible, I mean, think about only about in just recently, the United States women were not supposed to, or were not allowed to have credit cards. A man was supposed to sign for them, even if they had a job. Can you imagine that right now, we tend to forget and I think we tend to forget too soon. How abused we women have been throughout the history, and how abused or how mistreated women have been. Systematically, you know, so when you realise that, it is possible for you to, to just take a bathing suit on O'Neal and jump in a pool, or lay in the sun, and go to a vacation by the beach, you know how many clients told me that they don't go on a beach holiday, because they are ashamed of their bodies. So they are denying their bodies, sun and sea, and ocean and vacations because they hate their bodies. So when we start with that, you know, when we start to cut through that shit, when we start to not entertain those ideas, those viciously hateful ideas about our bodies. We will have brainspace again and again didn't get I will tell you we will have we will have more fun. We will be able to das Have you seen you know if you can google or you you can search on YouTube, like overweight dancers. And because we have this idea that we have to be slim, you know, Slim is the best. But don't forget 97% of the women have hate viciously hateful voices inside their heads, about their bodies. That includes almost all the women no matter how thin or overweight they are. So, going back to the overweight dancers or even fat dancers, for me, as I said, fat is not a triggering word for me anymore. It's just like, Okay, it's it's just like, random opinion. If somebody says like, Oh, you're fat, or you're too fat, or you're not fat or whatever, you know, it's just like, telling me oh, your your hair is is dark, or you have as I as I do I have currently if you're listening to this podcast in 2023 in February oh my god, so hilarious. I have an appointment with my hairstylist. And she's a magician. So we'll see what she pulls up this time. If I will still have blue highlights in my in my hair. Or she will will have to change the colour because apparently it's a shortage of my favourite brand of of hair highlights. And yes, if somebody would tell me like, I don't like your highlights. I think you should have other colour of your highlights or no highlights at all. Because Come on. What serious woman has highlights when she is soon 47 years old. Like a up? That is just an opinion. So the word fat is like, for me it's not jingling anymore. So no matter how thin or fat we are where we take away that problem from our body from our brain, you know, when that problem doesn't exist, and we are able to just enjoy our lives to go to dance, and move our bodies without being self conscious

Nadina Cojocaru 14:59
searching You Tube like fat dancers or overweight dancers or stuff like that, and look, because they look so beautiful in my opinion. And I shared those with one of my clients, she was trying to rehearse something for four. The first day I said at her wedding or somebody's wedding, and she wanted to have a dance routine, and she was so self conscious about her body, and I was sending her those, those YouTube videos with overweight people dancing, and it was like they are so they look so hot, they look. So it's not, it's not about how much fat tissue you have on your body. It's about your ability and having fun while you are dancing. That is what is so appealing, you know, when the confidence is really sexy, actually, it's really hot. You know, it's appealing, when you are confident in your body, and you have fun, and you move your body? Who the fuck cares, that you have roles and stuff like that? I mean, it's, and it's not only me, because she agreed with me, like, yes, those look really hot, and it's not about they look really sexy. Both are both women and men who are, quote, unquote, fat look really great when they dance, and they have fun. So when this is out of our mind, you know, when we defog, you know, or we lift that veil or cut through that veil then we have the, the ability of even connecting with what our body really wants, you know, with that intuition. You know, women have always been really intuitive creatures. And, you know, you can call it whatever you want. But we have intuition, we have the ability of reading other people's emotions, or even body language, or animal's body languages, which is really useful in our profession. So it's not only about reading charts or having blood samples, of course, those are mandatory, don't get me wrong, I mean, I am all in for the highest level of of science in, in the veterinary profession. That is not what is all about. But if we don't connect with that patient, and we don't read what that the body that is telling us that we can sometimes, and that actually happened, we sometimes make more harm than good, if we are just treating blood sample results instead of focusing on on the animal on the on the whole team. So that's okay, another another story, but it's so important because we are so self conscious, you know, in in instead of focusing on the animal and to have fun and to connect and to connect with the pet owners and to be open to what they have to say. We are so self conscious all the time. Because, yes, this is an internalised oppression or internalised opinion, that fat being fat or overweight is bad. That if we are fat, we are less worthy of attention, we are less worthy of being considered smart. They are studies done on that people are systematically bullied and systematically not heard. not understood by the medical profession. For example, so when we are so self conscious about our body size, about our abilities when we believe all the time that we have to be Perfect, and that you know, that we are not supposed to be wrong. And we have to, you know, even if you are a let's say an are more experienced than that in your in your clinic you have this self consciousness all the time that, oh, I have to perform perfectly. I don't have to show my younger colleagues that I'm not really good at that thing. And we are so self conscious all the time, we are so anxious all the time about how we are perceived. We have those voices in our hands all the time. Oh, why did you do like that you should have said something differently, you know, even even after a meeting, how many times are we not replaying that fucking meeting in our heads trying to have done something differently or, or beating ourselves up because we haven't said specific words or we haven't done specific things, torturing ourselves over and over again and then projecting in the future things that hallucinating futures that have never happened of course, the bleakest futures that can be imagined over and over again. So that is that is what our brains are fogged by. And those things are not subtle, and they are not small. They are huge, they take a lot of our brain space. So, when we are talking about losing weight that is what I'm talking about is not about food. It's about first defog our brains first systematically looking in the mirror, and become friends with our bodies with all the forms, all the all the bumps or all the lumps all the things and start becoming friends with our bodies with how we look like to be, you know, to recognise when we, when we get a glimpse in the mirror, about how we look like to not be surprised, we Oh, it's just my body, you know, over and over again. So we are not self conscious, conscious all the time about our bodies. That's the first one. That is the most important one. And I'm explaining in the body image bootcamp that is, is a module in in the sparkler vets programme

Nadina Cojocaru 23:52
we have to do this over and over and over again, day by day. And it probably takes not more than a month I think I'm exaggerating when I'm saying a month of systematically doing that exercise that I'm presenting inside the course to just look in the mirror, seeing your body from from your pets perspective or from your kids perspective that don't give a shit about how you look like and and then try to see how loving they see or look at you like over and over again. And then use some some stress or distress to down regulate your nervous system because your nervous system will go bananas expect that when you will see your photos because you are so used to hate them and then prepare yourself for hearing those things. So when we are on fogging ourselves when we lift that veil when we are really confident in our bodies when we wear clothes that are comfortable, that are not cutting in our skin we will have so much brain space about to bring in some confidence, you know, to stop beating ourselves up to some being so self conscious, and to be able to say I don't have any fucking idea what is wrong with your dog, but I might open a book, I will call a friend, or I will refer you to somebody who has a fucking idea what might be wrong with your dog. You know? What's the problem with that? Confidence looks good. And when we are confident, and I'm not talking about overconfidence, stupid people taking water above their heads, and doing stupid things, we're not, this is not what I'm talking about. I'm not talking about because that is that is not that is just that is not calm confidence that that is coming from overcompensating. Your anxiety, you know, a confident person knows when to say I don't have any idea what is wrong with your pet. And a confident person won't be afraid to just the first thing just listen to the pet owner, listen to what they have to say. Really, listen, listen hard. And the second one is look at the look at the animal connect with the animal. I mean, not you know, in the woods, like staring, whatever, whatever that looks like for you. You know, what, what am I talking about, but, you know, just just go I mean, check the animal. I mean palpate search for lumps and bombs and, and, you know, just palpate the abdomen. We are so disconnected with that, you know, basic examining technique. Of course, we have all as I said, I'm all in for the most advanced technology. But at the end of the day, we have to be able to check that animal with our hands with our senses with our, you know, the conscious mind, the conscious mind is able to take in consciously between five to nine, some people say seven to nine, some people say five to seven, let's let's be generous here, let's say nine, let's say that it's not my, the vast majority of of people say Max Max seven things at the same time consciously. That means that is so that is why it's so hard when we first learn how to drive, especially if we don't have an automatic gear changer. And it's a manual one. So it's like the mirrors and then the instructions and then blinking you know, and and then the rear mirror and then I've already am on on for and then the other members of the traffic you know the of the of the poor participating in the, on the road. And, and now we are on five by the unconscious mind takes in millions of bits of information at you know all the time that we're not conscious about you know, the level of carbon dioxide. In in the air that we are breathing, we are not conscious about that. That is sensed by unconscious parts of our brains. That is just a small example. So we take in information with the unconscious mind or the unconscious processes of our brains that are millions. And I even know some therapists or even doctors who after discover this, this ability of the unconscious mind of taking any informations about some patients, at the end of the day, like side note, at the end of the day, they just create a self induced light hypnosis or deeper relaxation that is happening, by the way I teach that for my clients, it's happening, like in two minutes, it's really easy to create that state, and then just ask, you know, the unconscious mind the wise as part of your brain? What is wrong with that patient? You know, what have you noticed? What is what is the things that I'm missing, and they are getting really good insights about things that, you know, when you, you think that if something is off, you feel it somehow that's intuition, okay, we call it like that. Those people do those things, you know, just go into that, you know, deep state of relaxation, that is take that takes like a self induced is like really easy, it takes just two freakin minutes. And then they ask, okay, what is wrong with that, you know, what am I missing? What can you tell me, you know, really, really nice technique to, to be able to do. So. When we are default, then we can connect with that animal, we can search through that information. And we will be able, you know, to palpate to see to to interpret what is wrong. And it it sounds so much more complex and time consuming than it actually is. You can still have your check in like five minutes or in 10 minutes, even if I'm not the kind of person who likes those kinds of things. I can do them. But I'm I don't think that's necessarily productive for you in the long run for for the clinic. It takes a special special kind of clientele. But that's another story. So in order to do that, but when you're connected, that thing doesn't take more than five to 10 minutes top, you know. So don't think that it's something that is overcomplicated, but when was the last time when you really did that, when you weren't in your head bitching and moaning about stuff, bitching and moaning about your body bitching and moaning about how your pants are in uncomfortable bitching and moaning about what you have eat or your what you have eaten or not. So it's not about food. It's about silencing the racing, hateful voices inside our hands.

Nadina Cojocaru 33:49
Being able to do that, and then to connect with our bodies, because we are the experts in our bodies and to see what our bodies would look like to eat, to cut through the fog and move on. So now is not only about food, it's about the fogging the brains from the negativity that we are swimming in. And it's always starting with our bodies. Trust me on that. That's the most important work that we can do. And that doesn't mean that we don't lose weight. I'm not saying that. People believe that if they don't hate their bodies, they're not able to lose weight. That is the end by the way, if you've tried it until now and you failed over and over again. Would you be willing to try it my way as well? And to really discover your intuition and how to guide your body towards the most helpful version of you over and over again, day after day and towards the most empowered version of veterinarian that you can be. As I said, it always starts with your body. Trust me on that. That's all for today. Have a wonderful rest of your day. Lots of love loving hugs.

Episode 41 - 97% of women...

In this episode, I'm going to talk about the scientific studies that show that 97% of women have viciously hateful voices inside their heads about their bodies...

WHAT YOU WILL DISCOVER

- You are not alone

- How this societal 'norm' has been internalised

- How we can dec🙊ntify our internal dialogue

LINKS SPECIFIC TO THIS EPISODE

👉 Sign up for the free webinar - https://us06web.zoom.us/webinar/register/WN_R2ml-oWRSR6lDDC4EruKkg

👉 Want to join the next round of Sparkly Vets Group Coaching? Book your free call here: https://calendly.com/vetcoachinternational/45min

HOW TO FIND ME OUTSIDE THE PODCAST

Find all the ways that you can interact with me here: https://linktr.ee/vetcoach (all of my free resources can be found here too)

Transcript: 

Nadina Cojocaru 00:00
And welcome to weight loss for small animal vets podcast. I am Nadina Cojocaru, DVM, and certified life and weight coach.

Nadina Cojocaru 00:15
Friends, welcome to episode 41 of the podcast 97%. How are you doing friends? What's up? So after my last podcast episode, which was about the abuse, and again, adult language is involved, the quantifying your business or your vet life, I got such a good response to that. And that aligned so much with this episode's topic, which is all about the 97%. And if you're wondering what the f is the 97%, let me enlighten you a little bit. So 97% of all women have viciously hateful voices in their heads, about their bodies. Again, for the people in the back 97% Those are scientific studies. This is based on scientific research. 97% of all women have viciously hateful voices inside their heads about their bodies. So I really want to put this into the light to understand that when you are part of those 97% of women, you are not alone. And when 97% of women, which means more than 50% of the population has vicious, or viciously hateful voices inside their heads about their bodies. This is not proving that there is something wrong with our bodies, it proves actually the opposite of that. When you have a norm and you see it, like the norm, like Okay, everybody believes her body is somehow bad. And if it's going in a society level on more than 50% of your population of human population, then there is a societal problem, not an individual problem or a body problem. It can be so that or it's impossible to interpret this percentage as 97% of all women's bodies are bad

Nadina Cojocaru 03:46
do you understand what I mean? It can be so this is not the truth. The truth is that more than 50% of this population has internalised a societal view about female human bodies that is really effed up. So what this does is that if we are not putting it into the open, if you if we are not starting this idea of okay, I have these ideas in my head, my own head, you know, every change, even if it's, it seems so big, you know, it's like, okay, but is this the whole society everybody around me believes the same thing, and so on and so on. Any revolution even if it's ever society level starts with one small step that one individual takes in an opposite direction. And when the norm is that our bodies or 50%, more than 50% of the human population live in a bed body somehow then we have to change the norm. We have to normalise that this is happening, to put it into the open, and then to take the smallest step that we as individuals can do or take in opposite direction. And that means, again, that word, de quantifies our internal dialogue. So, just because I have internalised that viciously hateful voice inside my head, that doesn't mean that I have to linger in that place to give you another percentage, body image issues, kill people. There are girls and teenagers and more than 85% of all humans who have an eating disorder live in a female body. So from all the people because it started to come up in, in male in humans who are born in male bodies as well. But still 85% Of all the humans who have an eating disorder are females or humans born in a female body. So those, this is another really interesting percentage to to reflect upon. Another percentage to reflect upon is that 81% of the girls have, who are 10 years old, they did that research 81% of the girls who are at the age of 10 are already on a diet no matter what is their body mass index. Again, 81% of the girls 10 years old, are already on a diet no matter what their body mass index is in order to modify their bodies. So body image again kills people. It's one of the mental problem that is life-threatening one of the highest life-threatening percentage have all other psychiatric problems. So I have to address that, as I said, Because 97% of all women cannot have bad bodies. That is a bullshit idea. If you have those by the way, do you know what 97% of women means? That means that even all the top models have body image problems. They still have hateful, vicious voices inside their heads. So no matter what is our body mass index, if we are looking at that sheet or no matter how our It is look like the games were rigged against us. There is no upside to keep having for keep having hateful voices inside our heads, about our bodies. No upside. If we are in a place where we constantly hear we're when we are constantly verbally abused, when we feel constantly verbally abused, there are studies on that our brain gets injured. We develop structural changes in our brains. So to not mention that our immune system goes bananas, our immune system is not functioning properly. If we are in an environment where we are verbally abused, we don't develop properly and our brains get structural injuries that short term our life, our intelligence and our well being that's why being constantly exposed to our inner verbal abuse that's why just not addressing this problem is a big health mental health issue. So first, I want to normalise that we all have those voices or, or have had those voices. Because it's impossible to escape this soup that we are born into or our is transmitted generationally through our DNA.

Nadina Cojocaru 12:47
So normalised that you have those kinds of voices inside your head. Or if you have them 97% of all women have them as well. And the second one is let's work towards modifying those abusers inside our hands, all those thought patterns that are offering us that we are bad, our bodies are bad, we have to hate our bodies, we have to hate our intelligence, we have to hate our our knowledge, all of those hit, you know, abusive voices, which means all of those abusive thoughts that our brain creates, through those synapses that are already on our habituated pattern. We can modify those. So let's stop being the cons inside our own hands because that is not beneficial. So let's Dequantify even our internal dialogue. This is an important work. And if you are willing to do this work, you can sign up for my next group coaching programme that will start in March 2023 or just send an email to info at vet coach international.com to get in contact with me or you can book a free session. The links are in my show notes. So if you feel that enough is enough, and you are ready To stop the bully inside your head and to discover how your life will just transform from that point on don't hesitate to contact me on social media, or as I said, to send me an email or to find those free coaching spots that are on our on my website on vet coach international.com or to just send me a message on Instagram, on Facebook and so on. So I want to warn you that profanities will be involved. So I cannot take away we, that part of me who drops a lot of F bombs, and a lot of cuss words because, hey, we are the vets we know how we talk to each other. So if I'm not your cup of tea, I love you. And please block me and unsubscribe from my email list. Because you will hear those words more and more. The more I silence my inner violent voices inside my head, the more congruent I become with what I think my my purpose is on this planet and that is to help you connect with your intuition with your wisdom and to help as many pets as possible to connect with the pet owners who really deserve your kindness and your grace and your knowledge and your sparkly ability of healing their pets and to give you the tools to take away the cancer from your life. Just saying. So let's decalcify our internal dialogue and I will create masterclass free masterclass. On on Zoom, it will be like a webinar form. So, you can have some tools to how to decalcify your internal dialogue and that applies to your body to your knowledge, you know all those things like imposter syndrome that is just the can't voice inside your head by the way. So let's decalcify the voice that tells you that dares to suggest to you that you are an impostor and to live more of this amazing, powerful creature and veterinarian that you are so don't hesitate to to participate in that masterclass. You will find the link to enrol in the show notes. That was all for today. Let's dig come to find our internal dialogue fence. Lots of love and hugs

Episode 40 - This Is ABUSE (Dec_ntify Your Business)

In this episode, I'm going to talk about why you don't have to put up with ABUSE as a veterinarian! *This episode is explicit*

WHAT YOU WILL DISCOVER

- What is the worst that can happen? Is it enough to keep them in your business?

- Why you should not put up with Abusive sh*t! (And why I will never encourage you to do so as your coach!)

- The Dec*ntifying process and the origins of the word c*nt!

LINKS SPECIFIC TO THIS EPISODE

👉 Overcoming Toxic People and Workplaces with Virgnie Loy: https://anchor.fm/coachnadina/episodes/32-Overcoming-toxic-people--workspaces-with-Virginie-Lo-e1og88q/a-a8jmvj7

👉 Want to join the next round of Sparkly Vets Group Coaching? Book your free call here: https://calendly.com/vetcoachinternational/45min

HOW TO FIND ME OUTSIDE THE PODCAST

Find all the ways that you can interact with me here: https://linktr.ee/vetcoach (all of my free resources can be found here too)

Transcript: 

Nadina Cojocaru 00:00
Welcome to weight loss for small animal vets podcast. I am Nadina Cojocaru, DVM, and certified life and weight coach.

Nadina Cojocaru 00:14
Hello, friends, welcome to episode 40 of the podcast. This is abuse. How are you doing friends? This week's episode is a special one because it's the 40th. One. And I really encourage you, because I will use more cuss words or swear words or inappropriate words than usual in a way that might offend some of you. So if you have kids around you, please use headphones or skip this episode, because it might not be your cup of tea. And I usually use a lot of F-bombs or I drop a lot of F-bombs. But this is this episode is going to be something extra. And I will just give you some time right now to just grab your headphones, pause it or skip it, you have been warned. So this week, I want to talk about D quantify, or D quantifying our businesses. What do I mean by that? I mean to remove the current out of our businesses, or out of your businesses, or out of your professional veterinarian life. And I am using the word count like cu NT, in its modern understanding of the world, or of the of this word. And I will give you my vision of or how this word was transformed over the years. But right now let's use this word, which is really harsh for some societies not that harsh in the UK or in Great Britain but more than so in, in the United States of America or in Canada. But we as veterinarians or veterinarians that are business owners or veterinarians that are my clients are using this word to present a type of client that we have in our veterinarian, businesses. That is that type of pet owner who is never content, who constantly manages or threatens to go on social media who is totally disrespectful and yells and says a lot of cuss words to your employees to other associates or to front desk people or to the vet techs, you know, they might be a little bit milder with you because you are the vet, but they are behaving really inappropriately in your clinic, and that you refer as can't. So I want to offer you that this type of behaviour or better said, putting up with this type of behaviour is abuse. It's abuse against you against your nervous system against your employees or your colleagues and their nervous systems. And you don't have to put up with that. So I've recorded a really good podcast episode with my colleague, Virginie Loy, who is an abusive relationship or workplaces coach. And you can find the link to that podcast in the show notes. But I want to offer you that having a client that behaves in that way is detrimental to everybody in the business. And you might have this idea that and I explore that I explored that with one of my clients and What's the worst that can happen is actually, if we really go there, and we give that person, you know, the person does all the things that they threaten, they threaten us to do. Okay, they will leave a bad review, they will leave a bad review on a Facebook site or on a Google read or a Google review that is not on your clinic site, but is on their personal Facebook or personal social media and so on and so on. And I will offer you that when you have the right tools, and you will start to see this as, as abuse, my work as a coach is not to coach you to put up with that kind of behaviour. This is not what coaching is all about. And that is against everything that I deeply believe, about you as my client, about you, as a veterinarian in a profession that is exposed to these types of behaviours over and over again, that burns us up and out and puts us in a really bad mental health state. And I will not stand up to coach you to, to, to put up with that kind of shit. Never the thing that I am, I am willing to do as a coach is to point out at you to be the witness, you know, the benevolent witness of a situation. And to tell you as it is, that is abuse. And as with any abuse, it's not something that we have to put up with, I understand that your nervous system might not be ready to go full in, in firing that person or that pet owner yet but what can I empower you to do right now, and from a more empowering or more resourceful state and what I mean by a more resourceful state, I mean, when you are in an emotional state, that is not panic, anxiety, stress, overwhelm fear. And you are not, you know, just thinking through your amygdala, and you can use your prefrontal cortex and you are more calm, and you understand that you're giving so much power to that client. By the way, the worst that can do, the worst that can happen is that she will leave you a bad review. And you might be you might not be there you know emotionally to be able to fire her or fire them completely because we are referring to cans, but there are decks there as well. So whether they are male or female, or whatever gender the abusers have it's not something that is especially for, for a female abuser, those come in all types of genders and, and forms. So when we give the power our power to the abuser and we believe that really our life will end if they do those things, and we are afraid to come to work where we open our medical chart system and we see a lot of messages from our co-workers like Oh lady D or Lady M called and said that we butchered her dog and you know, lady, whatever X called and she wants to be called immediately by the business owner because that was so inappropriate. How and we just

Nadina Cojocaru 09:40
as I said, shaved too much and we ruined the dog's skin or whatever the complaint is and you have like 10 messages every day from that person who calls repeat diddly and complaints and is rude and takes so freaking much brain energy from your, from your co-workers from your employees from everybody that is an abuse, you wouldn't put up with a family member or a partner, or anybody else who behaves in this way, never, you would never see a super marketing boss putting up with such shit. So especially when we know the level, of medical care that we are able to provide for that, for that patient, we don't need that type of behaviour, we don't need to put up with that type of behaviour. It's just draining our mental energy, our mental health, and our sparkles. And it's not something that is beneficial for us or for our businesses or for our other clients in the business because this is not how we envisioned the medical or the vet profession to be this is not fun anymore if you're constantly afraid to come to work and to find 10 messages from that person. So, and I will point out as your coach that that is not unacceptable behaviour, you need somebody to point out to you, what is actually happening here, what are the facts, what are they actually capable of doing, and how to build resilience and to get your power back. And to help you empower other members of your team. Like the front desk, people, people who are taking messages to deal with that kind of behaviour, which is abusive, if they are coming in or making a scene is no problem, it empowers your practice manager or your as I said front desk people they have to know that you have their back and they have to behave really professional and call the police if the person is abusive or saying mean words you don't have to put up with such behaviour never. So, the moment you d quantify your business, because those are such rare people, the vast majority of our pet owners are loving exceptional human beings. And that type of behaviour just wears us down immensely. It affects us as I said mental health it affects the way we eat, it affects our alcohol consumption, our smoking and all those other behaviours that are detrimental to our health, because we cannot cope with so much negativity and we are so afraid to go back to work to deal with them to have to call them knowing that they will never be satisfied, they will never be happy, they will complain all the time. And the s as a coach I can reframe that thing like because they are for sure really really suffering inside of them and inside of their heads. But that is not on me or that is not on you they need to deal with their shit and not expose you to that kind of behaviour like never. So what is your level of confidence to deal with the D quantifying process you might put a notice in your in your medical chart system. not welcome here not receiving any appointment or just plainly just send the same time the medical records and tell them really professionally that this is not the type of behaviour that you accept in your clinic. And do you wish them good luck and find a more or how to phrase it more appropriate match with another clinic or another veteran vet team. So, that will, that will free up so much mental space for you and for your team. And you will feel, again, that your sparkles are coming back, you will feel again, you know, the love and the acceptance or the gratitude of other clients that you have other pet owners because we are not even able to see those things that are happening over and over again, just because of that one. That is abusive. This is how our brain works. Unfortunately, we are focused on that negativity. And I would, I would challenge you to just take a deep breath in and to imagine the worst-case scenario over and over again. And if she, if she writes a bad review Who the eff cares, seriously right now, even if I'm going to a hotel or to a holiday, I will always check the hotels or the reviews on the travel agency's website or on TripAdvisor or on Google. So I will look at the worst reviews. And then I can see I can sense easily is like okay, that is a count, that is a, an abuser, that is not something that I would be bothered by, you know, because people feel those things, give your other pet owners some credit. Because if you are a, a nice human being, and you read such a review, and you answer to that, you know, because anybody can complain on their personal Facebook page, and you don't have access to that reply. But if they don't give you access to reply, that's a reply in itself, if you are not willing to allow space for the person who you are accusing, to give their side of the story and you are closing the feed the Facebook wall or whatever social media wall, just for those who are on the same page with you, you won't want them in your business anyhow. We don't want them. So they are really welcome to go somewhere else. So this type of, of the idea that, Oh, let's Silverline everything, no, I'm not freaking doing that. And I understand that they are suffering, but that is not on me that is not on you, you have to be empowered, and to get rid of all the things that are draining you. And those are usually like a handful of clients maybe one or two to be actually accurate because of some of the clients are stressed and they are seeing me and things but they usually call us back or send us an email and apologise for the behaviour. And we totally understand that people brain people's brains are going bananas sometimes, but a systematic can't behaviour is not acceptable.

Nadina Cojocaru 18:51
So let's bring up some resources to have confidence to look at the facts, what can she do, what can happen, and what are my liabilities in this situation? What are my powers, how can I empower myself and usually what is what is really interesting about this is that if you are the business owner, if you are the vet and the business owner, try to imagine that you have two persons inside of you, you have the business owner and you have the boss and if you are the employee you are the associate it or you are the employee of that boss and that boss is constantly throwing you under the bus of that pet owner and you are constantly forced to face that type of behaviour. That is not a good relationship between a boss and an employee. That is an abusive relationship as well. So I know that is sometimes is a more difficult for us to defend ourselves, but if you have a practice manager or you have another, sometimes even a vet tech or somebody else who is in charge of the clinic empower them to help you. So, give them some ideas about protecting you, and the steps that needs need to happen for that person to leave your practice or to just not torture, the vat or the employee with all that garbage. So, and if you are for instance, if you are in, in another type of dynamic, where you are just an associate or you are relieved that and somebody else is like the clinical owner or the boss or the CEO of the company, where you are working, try to question a little bit that dynamic, it is it something that you want to put up with, if they are throwing you under the bus all the time, and you have to deal with those kinds of behaviours because they are unwilling to fire those clients or not. So I would never do that. I mean, it's, it's something that, that people did with me as well as an employee. And it's, it's not nice. So, when this happens, we that trust is broken, and it will never be repaired again. So that person was not was fired after that, the that boss that I had at some point. So an intelligent business owner will always see the value or what is happening of a vet versus a random CEO or a random practice manager. So if you are in that kind of dynamic, just see what are your options? And how long are you willing to put up with that behaviour, or how to shift your mind around that type of behaviour. And my deepest, my deepest wish for all of you is to really decalcify your businesses for sure. You don't need that kind of shit in your life, you don't need that kind of, of mental gymnastics, to put up with that. And yes, some pets will need to find another Vet provider because their pet owners are abusive. So I think awareness is necessary and more the quantifying of our business or your vet business is definitely necessary. You are not dependent on that. Remember, you will gain so much brain space you will be able to receive that gratitude that all the other pet owners are giving you and that you are not able to see right now oh to feel because you are in such a dark rabbit hole because of that can't one of them. So let's push up and put some more resourceful states on or emotional resourceful states like confidence and having their own back and being professionals and we're in their communications from the first person in the clinic who they meet first like the front desk and the practice manager or the vet techs or other associates or you as an employer, employee, or even you as a boss and start slowly in the rhythm or in the pace that your nervous system is capable of dealing with it. Start slowly cutting all those trends that suck up your joy from you From from this profession. So, the more you will be willing to do that, the easier it will be to remember that at some point you love this profession. So, I would deeply encourage you to do that. And now my, my idea of that is so interesting that society has vilified the word count, I am not necessarily finding the meaning of that word. So, so obscene anymore because I found the origin of that word and that origin is from ancient tribes, and the count was spelt with a K and was a magical and powerful, powerful healer. People were washed, worshipping women, when and we were always in the past, found our cycles and rhythms were seen as magical, and our sexuality our sexual pleasure were worshipped. And our master creations were really states of deep empowerment and connection with nature and the contours, as I said, the magical powerful healer, who and it was no shame attached to that something happened. And the Great, the greatness of, of life, power of female sexuality became controlled or dampened. And women were shamed for being women, sometimes in the Middle Ages, where Claire, usually, priest or or clergyman started to see the idea of woman's genitals as a potent source of evil. And the word Kuhn is Dr. Barley meaning devilish, Kant became the norm for vilifying the woman's genitals, the woman's sexuality, our connection with nature, our connection with the plants with the animals, our intuition, and women started to be literally burned alive, in those big massacres, that happened during the Middle Ages. So, that was, that is the origin of the vilifying idea of account. But initially, the word if we are looking in the history, or the etymology of that word, that was actually a magical powerful healer, especially during, in all the old life phases of a woman, especially when

Nadina Cojocaru 28:36
using, you know, like the sexual force, the menstruation cycle, to create connection with nature with a name with, with the cycles of nature and to bring in intelligence and connection with other animals or the earth. So, that's why I'm not that triggered about this word and using this word, so, but I use it like that the quantifying idea is mostly based in in the modern view of the word count, which I don't necessarily embrace because as I said, for me, the word count has another significance that ancient healer, magical healer, not necessarily the, the type of abusive behaviour that some women or some men know, no gender is, is a different than the other are choosing to, to embrace while in the presence of a veteran. an Aryan medical professional. So that was all for for this episode I will open the enrollment for the next group of sparkly vets. So just contact me if you're interested in that. You can find the link to a short or a 45 minutes free coaching session or a free discussion to see if we are a match. As you can probably see, I use a lot of cuss words if the situation requires it. And I use a lot of giggles and a lot of laughter and a lot of neuroscience-based tools to shift your or to improve our vets mental state and to help them lose some weight if they if they are interested in that. Otherwise just some more sparkles in their lives will be brought. So that was all for today. See you around. Follow me on Instagram on bad coach international or on Facebook or on my personal page Nadina Cojocaru on Instagram, Instagram as well. Have a beautiful rest of your day. Lots of loving sparkly hugs.

Episode 39 - How do you want to feel instead? - This sh*t works!

Nadina Cojocaru 00:01

Welcome to the Weight Loss for Small Animal Vets Podcast. I am Nadina Cojocaru, DVM, and certified life and weight coach.

Nadina Cojocaru 00:15
Hello, friends, welcome to episode 39 of the podcast. How do you want to feel instead? How are you doing friends? What's up? What about this question? So I just shared with the people that are on my email list that I'm always learning, always fascinated by the latest neuroscience of our brains. And some people might think that, Oh, if you're interested in neuroscience, and it's so easy right now to get access to the latest studies. And that is true. And I have to confess that I had some really bananas revelations about some neuroscience that is around for decades, I mean, people I said decades, like that metaphor, or that description of the, of the brain with, like, the lizard brain, and then the more evolved cortex, and then the prefrontal cortex and the neocortex that is just for humans. And hello, I have been using those analogies. And big, big names in, in the coaching world, in the therapy world, even doctors, human doctors, are using those analogies, that are not true. We've, we've been known. I mean, we knew or those studies are out there for decades. And we still use that old analogy about the lizard brain, by the way, I called myself or my brain, the mighty dragon, or my, you know, my primitive brain, my lizard brain, that is not true. That are no concrete separations, of the three brains in our world, and that idea is completely bananas. Wrong. Okay. So, you might think, as I said, that people are more up-to-date with all the science but I think what neuroscientists and psychologists lack right now is some serious PR training because it's like, you know, that old saying that is a little bit gross, but on a really old, white dude has to die for that idea to be replaced, which is, I know, but you know, patriarchy, we have to bear in mind, all those things. And to put them out there, but it's kind of true, you know. So, I am always learning as I said, I teach in, in circles or I usually come coming back to my point. So, I am currently doing training for 12 months done by David Bedrick. A really, really, really amazing name in, in psychology, and on like neuroscience or, or techniques that are based in science, and he teaches us during a 12-month training, some somatic techniques, how to interpret how our bodies or facial expressions or sound Dance, Music, Songs. How can we express role-playing as on its own because our unconscious minds who are 97% now 95 to 97% of our, our brain express themselves sometimes in a way that are not cognitively conscious, but we can see them as practitioners or as people who are trained, we can see them in the body language of the person of our clients, basically. So that involves some client, some kind of Shamanic client body expressions. So I am not the shaman, the I guide the client to become the shaman. To interpret their own sensations and experiences, which is really fascinating. And David Bedrick is one of the best researchers in the world about shame, and especially body shaming in women. And he has a book as well, a book that all my clients are getting when they are we start working together. And the book is called you can't judge a body by its cover. And really amazing and foundational work, I think, for everybody who or, or reading for everybody who wants to, to change their image about their bodies and, and how to, to start a journey of healing their relationship with their bodies. So that is one of the trainings that I'm currently doing. And the other one is a course that is called be FCC, which stands for the best fucking coaching course. And in the B FCC, I was so attracted, I fell to the pool, the pool towards this course, who is created who was created by Melissa tears. And I've mentioned I've mentioned her name a few times, I think during this podcast because she is the creator of the center of integrative hypnosis in New York, author of amazing neuroscience-based techniques. And books that even psychologists and psychiatrists and therapists are using to inform themselves about the latest researches in in the field. And she is my trainer and my teacher and a person that I deeply love and appreciate. I appreciate her brain I appreciate her congruence with what she teaches and how she learns and she always is learning always studying. So she created I trained with her last year in hypnosis in integrative hypnosis and coaching the unconscious mind and she created this course with Simone soul which is a marketing which I think or no, let's call her the Korean fairy godmother of congruent marketing and she lives in Seoul, South Korea, and they together created this amazing course called BFCC the best fucking coaching course. And they are training us again in how to change habituated patterns of thinking and feeling in enacting for instance, if you are reaching for the cookie and you want to change that habit, you have to know how to deal with the unconscious mind to change that habit how how to activate the Mellisa calls it the problem state no

Nadina Cojocaru 09:47
neural network and then to shake it off or, to dim it a little bit and then to activate or Resource state and then to patch that resource, emotion risk resourceful emotional state, to the initial trigger. So how do you want to feel instead, as I said, Melissa is usually saying, I teach in circles in order to change your habit to the habit of, of responding to an urge to reach for the cookie to reach for McDonald's, to reach for, to go to the fast food to eat the cheap at Chick fil A, instead of, of eating your lunch, or the pizza or whatever, how do you want to feel instead in that moment, instead of feeling the urge, or the craving, or how do you want to feel, instead of being overwhelmed or stressed or anxious at work or at home, and then they teach us in the course, the tools that I already knew, the courses in the beginning, so, some of the tools I already knew from last year, when I did intense training with Melissa tears. And right now, they are teaching us and we are practising a lot with our colleagues from the course and we are practicing with each other. And basically, we change the way the brain and the body respond to some triggers. So that is, if you like to know the mechanisms that go behind the change whatever tool you need to change a habituated pattern or to change the way to explain it in more plain words, how to change your reaction in front of some triggers, let's let's talk about bad reviews or let's talk about as I said specific foods or you know, the glass of wine or the bourbon or the whiskey or whatever you know, how to react, how to change your reaction that is auto on autopilot right now, because we have been doing that or have been taking that action for a long time, how to change it with something else with another emotional state, that would ensure moving forward towards our goals, no matter which goals, we are talking about our goals in creating a different relationship with our loved ones or with our kids or with our in laws or how do you want to feel in that moment that is different that the problem state or the emotional state that you are in right now. And that creates an unwanted result for you. So we played a lot and I am so amazed by how many of my previous colleagues from other life coach schools are attending this course because the way to understand the way our brains change and to understand the science for me as a veterinarian as a medical brain, I love those things because it's so interesting for me to know the why behind all the things that we we do with our clients in order to get results and it's so fascinating for me that change can really happen in an instant. So I I have a colleague that I met through the Life Coach School Her name is Amanda Kingsley. And I recorded a podcast interview with her she has a podcast named bringing life bringing sorry bringing light into abortion. And I do a podcast interview with her speaking about my experience as as a kid as a rule Really no little girl in communist Romania, and how I perceived that. That law that was enforced in Romania in 1960. And of course, I'm born in 76. So, throughout my childhood, I experienced that. That vision of having abortions not legal. So I recorded that podcast with Amanda and we kept in touch. And now we found each other together in the B FCC. So we know some tools Until now we were like, three or four tools by now that were presented. And we are supposed to practice those. Practice, practice, practice. Until we get really good in, in applying those tools to create some different state or different outcomes, different emotional state for our clients, and Amanda had a tummy bug. And she felt like crap, so she couldn't eat. She hasn't. She hasn't been eating for a few days. And all the nausea, nausea and all the all the poop situations and all the barf situations. And she just playfully asked in in the Facebook group. That is for the BFC students. Oh, would the tools that we are learning right now would they help me? Get away from my aversion for food and for chicken tenders? Specifically? And Melissa said yes, for sure. And I said, Oh, I am the vet. I can handle everything that is gross. Even if that involves like, barfing and, and poop situations. And I was like, Okay, bring it on, Amanda. So we booked a session together. And she recorded it, I thought that she wanted to post it in, in the BMCC. But she posted it on her YouTube channel. So you will get the link in the podcast notes. And I shared this link with the other people on my email list already. So they had to watch it or they could watch it if they want it too. But to understand what I am doing in that 30 minutes long, I don't think I think it's 30 minutes top recording of our session is conversationally I use conversational hypnosis I use EFT or emotional freedom technique, both Faster EFT and the more the classic EFT and the long version. And then I use a tool that is or the description of you know that activating the problem network neural network in your brain then activate the resourceful state and then paste you know, it's like copy, copy that good feeling paste it to the problem to the trigger. So in that in that short recording, I literally changed Amanda's aversion towards food because she was not capable to have eating she was really really really nauseated all the time. And using embedded commands, and as I said, conversational hypnosis and all those tools and a lot of profanity. I'm sorry for that. You know that I drop F bombs but in fact recording is like F bombs all over the place.

Nadina Cojocaru 19:54
And literally did mind surgery on her right Removing the nausea and allowing her to eat. So I'm really proud of that piece of work because I couldn't use all the tools in my toolbox. I just used the tools that have been presented by this time. And it's working wonderfully. So if you want to experience that is, as I said, just a fraction of a fraction of the tools that I currently have in my toolbox to help you achieve the things that you want to achieve. So there is some conversational hypnosis for sure, I can use trances as well, to deepen that, that transformation, but transformation is happening during those conversational things where we activate the resource state, you know, the the feeling that we want to feel instead of that sensation, or emotion or feeling that we currently have. So to give you a specific example, with that YouTube video is Amanda was constantly feeling nausea. And that was debilitating for her. She couldn't eat, she couldn't see food, even so, and then I used a good resource I created, I activated a really strong, peaceful memory of her. She posted in the B FCC Facebook group, a picture of her and her and her family by the lake. So that was one of the most peaceful memories that she had. And I use that resource. That emotional resource to be more specific, what I mean by that. So I took those emotions and how those emotions were feeling in her body and then pasted them towards the trigger or the things that the thing that she was feeling in her body so and then throughout the day, she kept giving me feedback that Yep, it was manageable, it was so easy to remember the resource date, and so on and so on. So that is the kind of change that escape or that is available for you as well. If you enroll to, in the sparkly vets face to the sparkly vets group program, and the new group will start in March 2023. By the way, if you're listening to that in the future, and I can't wait to help as many from as many events as possible to change their relationships with their bodies with the way they eat by creating new healthy habits like exercising not as a weight loss tool. We are not doing that. But to to feel great, to be healthier, to be to have the strength and to have mobility and I can't wait to work with as many as possible from you. And of course I still use the tools that I learned first from The Life Coach School, the self-coaching model and all that frame. But as I said, I can work with the way you express your emotions, the way your eye can read your body They and your body language. And if you are willing, we can have deep transformation really fast. And then in between the sessions, you will have all the tools to beat it like the drum, you know, when you see the trigger, then you have the tools that you use over and over and over again by yourself, because I don't want you to be addicted to me. Again, I've said that multiple times, of course, if you want to work together, because it's fun, and because we have that community events who are showing up and they are coming to the coaching calls, and we laugh together like crazy, and we have a lot of fun. And, of course, it's that is available, as well as a continuous relationship or a program. But if you want to kick start your weight loss journey, or if you want to just shift the way you currently feel about being a vet about your practice about your job, you are more than welcome to contact me. I am a really open, approachable and down to earth person. Sometimes I'm going to the stars, and I'm fucking sparkly. But you can you can just send me an email. And I know a few of you. Quite a few of you tried to contact us last December in 2022. And I have to apologize publicly for that because we had a glitch in the system. And Louisa, my vet coach assistant, fixed it today and sent some apologies to those poor people who wanted to ask me some things. And it was, as I said, a glitch in our technical stuff on my website, so I didn't receive those questions, or the people who signed up for my resources that are free on my website. Didn't get the resources. Oh my god, that is so embarrassing. But yeah, what you see is what you get. So I apologize for that people Louisa has fixed to that right now. And if you want to go to my website, www dot vet coach international.com we have right now available a sheet stand up for free resources, you have the book list, the moment I read something immediately on my list on my website, that list is always updated by Louisa. And you can even ask me, if you can reach me. Of course, as I said, sorry about that. Now, now you can send us an email. And you can ask me, okay, which book would you recommend? Because, as I said, I've I changed my mind or I changed my view about how brain works and the more I know, the more I change my mind and I shift and I admit to that, okay, that was not how our brains are constructed. And the lizard brain doesn't really exist in that in that aspect that is described by your older ideas about neuroscience. Yeah. So as I said, Send me an email or ask or contact us through the website and or shoot us an email at info at vet Coach international.com and we will coming back to you hopefully other waiters shake us a little bit Hey, I didn't I am not receiving the resources or what is happening. Oh my god. Yeah, as I said, So embarrassing. that technical stuff is like not my strongest point. So

Nadina Cojocaru 29:49
if you want to watch the YouTube video when I am doing the conversational hypnosis and the change Interview with Amanda Kingsley. You can find it in the podcast show notes. And as I said, I'm pretty proud of that piece of change to physically remove one person's nausea in just 30 minutes is pretty freakin amazing. So as I said, I'm am really happy that Amanda recorded it and posted it on her YouTube channel. So go watch it. And if you don't know what I mean, or what I am doing, if you are a coach, for instance and want to, to learn how to do this technique, I would strongly recommend you to join the next best fucking coaching course, which will start in if I understood correctly in September 2023. So this shit works, folks. And how do you want to feel instead, you can always ask this question. In the moment, when you feel the urge. When you feel the anxiety, when you feel the emotion. When you feel the overwhelm, or, or the stress or the anxiety or the fear. Just be in that moment and ask yourself, how do we want how do how do I want to feel instead. And if it's peace, find a resource that creates space, a memory, I mean, a memory a resource is an emotional state. To give you the definition, or how Melissa tears is describing the resource state is an emotional memory that you can paste to activate simultaneously to neural networks that were not familiar with each other for, for instance, food was creating automatically nausea for Amanda. And then I took the peace and the calmness and all those sensations, the older all the details of the memory, the more. The more we activate that memory, the more senses we include in that memory activation, like you will see sound and smell and feelings and other emotions who is with you and so on and so on. The easier it is to change the reaction that we have against the trigger. So it's it's something really, really interesting to, to watch and to see that it's possible. That was all for today, as I said, really excited. And don't forget to ask yourself when you go into in those dark rabbit holes that are not useful for you in that moment, because sometimes those are useful to experience something about that later in another podcast episode. But if you want to change an emotional state, it is easy. You don't have to linger in that initial shitty one too long because that is just reinforcing the problem. Not shifting yet. So shifted as soon as possible with a better one. That was all for today, folks. Happy to be in your life and in your years. Talk to you soon. Lots of loving, sparkly hugs. Bye